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In our Schools…
Bullying is an Adult Problem
There Must be an Attitude of Change
By Brenda High, Director, Bully Police USA
Contrary to what many people believe, bullying
is an adult problem, not a child’s problem. Adults are entirely
to blame for bullying in our schools because they do not stop
it. Bullies bully because they can, and because they can get away
with it and adults decide when, and who will get away with bullying.
Bullying is not a “part of growing up”
or even “boys will be boys” problem. Bullying is an
adult believing that its “part of growing up” and
an adult believing “that boys will be boys”.
Adults who did not experience severe bullying
may excuse a bully by saying, “Back in my day, bullying
was just something we all had to go through to make us tougher.”
These adults show a lazy or uneducated attitude towards bullying.
The children under their care are living in a risky and unsafe
environment where bullying will be excused and tolerated.
Some others might say, “Back in my day,
bullying wasn’t that bad.” There is some merit to
this belief. Thirty-five years ago, we did not have “classes”
on how to bully, by way of violent television and movies, raunchy
comedy, sexually degrading pornography, violent video games and
cyberbullying on the internet.
We adults need to change our attitudes about bullying.
Whatever is unacceptable behavior in the adult world is unacceptable
behavior in a child’s world. If an adult were bullied at
work, for example, there could be repercussions for that type
of behavior, which may include the bully being fired, disciplined,
or even a lawsuit. In addition, if the bullied worker chooses
not to do anything, they could leave their job and go to work
somewhere else. Under the same conditions, could a bullied child
have his or her bully fired or easily decide to leave school?
This has proven to be unlikely.
At some time in our life, we will all be touched
by an act of bullying or the aftereffects of bullying. Suicide,
(“bullycide”), depression, anxiety, Post Traumatic
Stress Disorders, serious emotional and physical illnesses; these
are just some of the things that can be caused from bullying.
Bullying is leaving a wake of victims, (who become bullying survivors),
all over the country. In addition, many of these survivors will
suffer the emotional consequences of bullying all their lives.
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[ Bullying Articles ]
Bullying and abuse in our schools will only be
removed from our schools by the combined effort of many concerned
and compassionate individuals, through parental teachings, social
education (inside the classroom) and financial means.
Education is the key to every successful action
we achieve in our individual lives, but when a group is educated,
they gain synergy in a powerful movement. Communities, teachers,
parents and students must build a consistent, planned program
to educate schools and classrooms about the dangers of bullying
because all children deserve to go to school to learn in a peaceful
and safe environment.
Some of the things we must do as educators and
parents are to:
• Have a plan of action to educate students and communities
about bullying
• Select programs to teach about the consequences of bullying
• Prepare students to react and take action when they see
bullying
• Focus attention on good behavior – Seize the teaching
moments
• Teach that bullying will not be tolerated
• Be consistent, persistent and diligent in the resolve
to stop bullying
• Teach victims of bullying that they have the power to
empower themselves, and
• Teach bullies that they have the power to change, thus
empowering themselves
I, and Bully Police USA, challenge all who wish
to make a difference, for the one child, or many children, being
bullied, by participating in BULLYING PREVENTION EDUCATION WEEK,
October 17 through 21, 2005.
Only through a colaberative effort will adults
face the problem of bullying and change the attitudes of those
who work and serve our children in our schools.
Brenda High is a passionate crusader, a mom
on a mission, to stop school bullying and peer-abuse in school.
She is the Executive Director of Bully Police USA and the mother
of Jared High who died by “bullycide”, a suicide attributed
to depression cause by bullying. She is the author and webmaster
of www.bullypolice.org,
which reports and grades anti bullying laws around the USA. In
1999, Brenda launched www.jaredstory.com,
a healing memorial website, which deals with just about every
subject imaginable to bless those who visit. She has spoken about
Bullying, Depression and Bullying to several groups, organizations
and conferences as well as leading teleconference educational
classes. She can be contacted at Brenda@jaredstory.com.
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