Is Bullying Your Problem?
By Steven Bell

The most horrible consequences of bulling, shootings and
suicides make news, but often school staff and community members
believe that bullying is an isolated issue that effects only a few
students. Worse, some actually believe that bullying is a “rite
of passage” which prepares both the bully and the victim for
success in life. The reality is that all communities are impacted
and damaged by bullying.

160,000 students miss school each day because of a fear of
being bullied. Research has proven that 60% of boys, identified
as bullies in grades six through nine, have a criminal conviction
by age twenty-four, while 40% have three or more convictions.
Gangs use bullying and “protection” from bullying as tools to
to intimidate and recruit, but youth don’t confine their bullying
to peers. Teachers confronted by defiant students are targets of
attempted bullying. Some students actually bully their teachers
into lower expectations, as their price for a tentative peace.
Students can’t learn in a climate of fear. Bullies and their
victims don’t achieve as much as students who are neither a bully
nor a victim. However, most bullying is not reported because
victims fear retribution, or being viewed as a coward if they
tell. Adult behavior often reinforces this fear. Telling youth:
“Sticks and Stones...; choose someone else to play with; I don’t
want to hear any more tattling; you tell them to stop; if
someone hits you hit them back; or I haven’t got time right now,
”
forecloses reporting.
Indicators of Bullying
The best indicator of bullying is a formal survey of staff
students, and parents. Asking students about bullying, what they
think it is, where it occurs, and how they feel about it will give
adults a clearer picture of what is happening.
Other indicators that bullying may be a problem include:
reports of student harassment, fighting, arguing, gossip,
gathering by cliques, areas of campus always occupied by the same
group, and office referrals for defiance or disruption.
An Ounce of Prevention Is Worth A Pound of Cure
Bullying occurs in the absence of adult supervision. The
best prevention is good supervision. Youth must know that adults
care and will respond to what happens to them, even if the adult
was not present to witness the event.

It’s easier to maintain positive student behaviors than to
address one problem after another, but behavior management systems
are needed. Positive student behaviors and bullying prevention
are facilitated by systems which connect students to the classroom
and school program by creating a sense of belonging, protection,
and common goals. The following are examples:
A student body can develop and adopt a goals statement or
code of ethical conduct, written in their own language, regarding
how they will relate to others, property and to work. They should
be held accountable to that statement, on and off campus.
School staff must be available and receptive to the reporting
of student harassment issues whether they occur on, or off campus.
Reporting harassment should not be considered tattling.
Teachers can make time, for reports of harassment, by having
a five minute activity ready for students when they enter the
classroom, at the beginning of each class period. This activity
enables students to get right to work, and gives the teacher time
to address any issues that students might bring with them to the
classroom.

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Administrators must be available and visible to students and
staff on campus, and in classrooms, as they carry the message of
the school’s mission and symbolize the school’s culture of
inclusion. Teachers and administrators can’t choose the time for
receiving a report of harassment, but they can choose the time for
following up on the report. However, follow up is essential.
Adults should never try to bring a bully and victim together
to “work out their problem, to resolve their conflict, or to
negotiate their differences.” Bullying is not about a difference
of opinion, or a conflict; it’s about a difference of power and
the abuse of that power. We should talk with the victim and the
bully separately.

We should never ask the victim to change, because it’s not
the victim’s fault that they were targeted for abuse. We don’t
ask the victim to solve their own problem with the bully, because
they don’t have the power to do so.
In our conversations with youth involved in bullying, we need
not use the labels bully and victim, but are better advised to
focus on the specific behavior. We don’t want to engage in name-
calling, because that is a tactic of bullies. We hold the bully
accountable for the unsatisfactory behavior by asking them to
explain it, and to resolve the damage they have done.
To the victim, we say:
“Thank you for telling me.
I’ll take care of this for you.
Let me know if you have any more problems.
”

Research shows that bullies develop out of conditions of
severe competition for attention and things; child abuse or
neglect; and inadequate supervision. These are youth who have
learned to “take care of themselves,” but in an inappropriate way.
Like the target of bullying, they need the supervision and the
protection of adults.
To the bully we say:
“Tell me what happened and why?
Tell me what you think you should do to fix this
situation.
If you think you might have a problem with someone,
let me know and I’ll take care of it for you.
”
If you don’t think bullying is your problem, ask the youth
around you. If you think you can ignore the issues they are
confronting, you are part of a problem that will come back to
haunt you with low school achievement, community gangs, and crime.
Schools can have a very positive impact on their surrounding
communities by preventing bullying and by assuring that no student
fails training for good citizenship. These are essential and
achievable goals for every educational setting.

Steve Bell: Served as Principal of two schools in Los Angeles. He is a recognized expert in bullying prevention. His assistance to the National Bullying Prevention Campaign is acknowledged on Campaign’s Website: http://StopBullyingNow.hrsa.gov
Steve’s website is: http://BulliesCanBeTransformed.com